Frenzy...

Obsessive-compulsive disorder...

I suddenly had the urge to hav my possessions cleaned...
i got my maid to wash both pairs of my usual shoes...
hardly considering that i would hav no footwear to go out in the next day...

I'm emptying out my wallet too...
wash wash... days in the old block...

I almost culdnt resist washing my bag too...

I felt strange...
was something wrong wif me...
I hope...
its not coming back...

jus then, i rmbed a term i had come across sum days ago...
Obsessive-compulsive disorder...
most well known for making people wash their hands over and over again until their skin tears...

what i nvr knew that this was the it...
when i wiki-ed it... some stuff came across as strangely familer, and rather... disturbing...

• Specific counting systems — e.g., counting in groups of four, arranging objects in groups of three, grouping objects in odd/even numbered groups, etc.
• One serious symptom which stems from this is "counting" steps — e.g., feeling the necessity to take 12 steps to the car in the morning.
• Fear of acting out on violent or aggressive impulses, or feeling overly responsible for the safety of others.
• A need for both sides of the body to feel even. A person with OCD might walk down a sidewalk and step on a crack with the ball of their left foot, then feel the need to step on another crack with the ball of their right foot. If one hand gets wet, the sufferer may feel very uncomfortable if the other is not. If the sufferer is walking and bumps into something, he/she may hit the object or person back to feel a sense of evenness. These symptoms are also experienced in a reversed manner. Some sufferers would rather things to be uneven, favoring the preferred side of the body.
• Twisting the head on a toy around, then twisting it all the way back exactly in the opposite direction.
• Often, the brain challenges the person to a challenge that you feel you will die if you do not do it correctly.

I think...
I need help...
thats 5/16 of the signs...
the 1 about the toy is what bothers me most...
it gives me these... goosebumps...
I dun like it...

Yet i know y its happening again... its her...

Help...